A Christmas Present for the Non-Statists on Your List

Recent posts have reviewed the enviro war against toilet paper and suggested the ideal present for your neighborhood collectivist. So it is appropriate to mix these two themes and suggest the ideal Christmas present for beleaguered taxpayers. It's a bit pricey (at least compared to what I spend at Costco) and I have no idea whether it is made of recycled fibers, but that shouldn't matter since conservatives and libertarians generally don't care about hollow gestures.